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 I have been wanting to go backpacking for years now.  Chad has taken Caleb and Hannah each individually but ever since college I have had a little one at home that one of us needs to keep an eye on.  I know there are backpacking families with young kids, but their parents know what they are doing and have gone before kids, most on long distance hikes.  When Hannah was six we bought a kids pack and my backpack the old model on clearance at REI Eve was going to be turning three and we were just shy of a year from starting our trip and wanted to have the things for backpacking so we could do it if we were given the opportunity.  Besides that, we could not take much in the car with us as we traveled about the country so backpacking sized camping gear made more sence than the things that we previously camped with.  For this reason we already owned most of the stuff that would be needed.  After packing it with us the first year and only using it a handful of times for camping our way to Wisconsin and at Lake Villacito in Colorado we haven’t packed it with us the last two assignments.  The timing worked out and family was willing to help get the gear to us.  Stephanie gathered our backpacking stuff from our camping tub and my in-laws  brought my loaded pack south when they visited us in the beginning of April. I did need to purchase a few items and had luckily been saving up some of my weekly play allowance and had enough to get most of the things I needed.  I run on a pretty minimal closet so we took a look around REI and found a down jacket on clearance for $46 which is an amazing deal.  I could hardly believe it. We also picked up a tank top there that was synthetic fabric thinking that I would need light weight.  I didn’t think about the potential of the straps rubbing my arms and needing a protective layer from that so needless to say I ended up getting another shirt to wear with kohl’s cash (from replacing my two pairs of holy jeans).  That cost me a whopping $2.15 after taxes.
I bought the purple synthetic long sleeve shirt at Walmart along with a cheap pair of sunglasses. I also bought a stick of sunscreen and bug spray.   I didn’t end up taking the bug spray as they didn’t seem to be a problem on the first section of trail in the desert anyway. 
Our sleeping bags are down and very compact but only go down to 32 degrees so an emergency bivy seemed like a good idea.  I didn’t use it but if it had been any colder I might have.  We looked at food options and I decided on oatmeal packets.  And a rice pasta probably not much more nutritious than ramen but it is light and cheap.  Tiffany had picked up a packaged misquite chicken for dinner and eggs for breakfast.  Since we ended up only needing those two meals we never got around to my oatmeal and pasta.  Guess I will be packing those for lunch at work these next few days.  I also learned the power of electrolytes for preventing bonking out when doing endurance events from training for and completing a century bike ride in 2011. 

The Starbucks card was a gift for Jay.  Tiffany’s friend who was dropping us off at the start.  In the shuffle of getting everything to San Diego Monday after a long shift at work it was forgotten in Murrieta.  He said, “No payment accepted.  Getting you guys to the start of the trail is my adventure for the week.” So alas it shall be quite a burden using that gift card myself. 😉The other part about planning this hiking trip was the logistics around it being the heaviest flow days for my period.  That took some research as to how to handle that.  If you want specific details on that let me know I would be glad to share I just thought that it may be too much information for some.  

Monday morning the new sleeping pad I had ordered to help ease the sciatic pain had not yet come in the mail. I thought the pain may flair back up as my back injury was only a week before. It had gauranteed delivery by that evening.  I decided that if I needed to swing back by the house for the pack I might as well leave everything there and pick it up after work.  I left the house at 0445 with sticky notes on my pack not to forget the tortillas n the fridge and everything that needed to go stacked around the end of my bed.  I got off work late at 7:00pm getting into Murrieta around 8:00pm then changed my clothes and gathered the refrigerated items as well as stashing my purse and wallet only taking the necessities out of it (this is where I left the Starbucks gift card in my wallet 😟) and headed south to Chula Vista getting in to Tiffany’s around 9:30-10:00pm.  I had a pounding headache and still needed to organize and pack my bag.  Tiffany was carrying the tent and o was carrying the stove and food. She had a water bladder j could use and we both made sure we had at least 5 liters of water on us. At  2.2 lbs/liter  it was heavy but there is no water for the first 20.3 miles.  I took out anything that was not deemed absolutely necessary but still the packs seemed heavy.  Neither one of us had a scale so we don’t know how heavy.  We had to have all the water, and should maybe have had more.  We finished packing and showered crawling into bed around midnight.  It had been a long day, my head still hurt and I still had to talk myself into sleep.  A mixture of excitement, anticipation, and a since of what have I gotten myself into churned through my mind.  Sleep sleep I needed to sleep 0400 would come soon and I needed at least a few hours. 

I feel bad.  Both my sister Suzanne (and family) and my mom have visited while we have been here and I have not detailed much or any of either visit. On this blog.  Mom came for her spring break in March.  We had just started packing up the house.  As a grandchild, not even a child of the estate, there was a lot of things that I did not feel comfortable sorting or making any decisions on and Grandpa could not help me.  It was just too stressful for him.  I could check in with each of the thre remaining kids and make decisions that way but that process is arduous, and very time consuming.   Mom was able to come in and work for nearly a week straight sorting all of the tax forms, legal documents,  and supplementing the boxes labeled with each grandkids name to make sure they were filled with items that would have specific meaning to them  as well as the specific items that had been requested from the estate. It was a hard and emotional job filled with tears, late nights, and early mornings.  I had been in a similar boat and was so thankful to have someone to share the burden with.  I however was not a very good partner in crime as I only had one day off the whole time she was here.  I did get to be off the morning she left however and so we got coffee and I drove her to Uncle Richard’s house where she met up with her sister for her sister time drive up to Sacramento to head home.  A lot was accomplished the week ended with many packages getting sent to loved ones and a u-haul driven to Sacremnto filled with items for the Sacramento family, Susanville, and Redding.  At that point the house no longer looked like Grandma and Grandpa’s house which made packing up easier.  We could breath easier as most of the “has to go to this person” stuff was done and the “should be done by a child not a grandchild” stuff was also done.  We worked away one or two work days a week taking some time to go away and still do some things besides work and the house.  Suzanne came the last four days we were in the house for the final push.  As much as I dislike not being able to answer all the questions as to where exactly everything is we needed the help. I also worked the entire time she was visiting except for the one crazy errand day where I might as well have not been home.  The kids are so cute.  I struggle at being a good auntie so it was fun to see Hadassah being so happy to see me.  I have lost ground with Elijah though.  After last summer we were on pretty good terms but at such a young age we are again strangers to him 😟.  Each visit was exactly what we needed when we needed it to get the job accomplished. 

I love my Desert Valley girls.  I have been wanting to visit since we arived back in California.  There are a number of reasons why it had not happened yet, one being the 2.5-3hour drive, and the other main reason is Chad is with the kids allow the time, I feel guilty about requesting to take other “field trips” besides work. That has him watching the kids all by himself.  On Satueday night the house keys had been turned over to the tenants, and my work was done.  The kids and Chad were in Oregon so I took the opportunity to visit Desert Valley L&D.  I met Anne for lunch first the. Visited with the nurses for about 2.5 hours.  A lot has changed there in a year.  I got to visit with a few of my favorites, but missed so many more that I would have loved to see.  2.5 hours was not enough, but the hospital is in a bad part of town and Gramdpa was worried about me being out so late.  It was hard to leave.  There is such good fellowship with the Nurses.  I love you guys!!!!

I was hesitant about how work was going to go with my back that was finally feeling normal again.  Driving the stick shift pickup with old shocks and a bench seat (That thankfully Chad was able to move up so I could reach everything easier).  I grabbed my ice pack and tucked it behind me to ice while I drove.  Having the seat made a big difference and I was able to lift my right leg into the car (quite a ways of the ground) with only the smallest twinge of pain.  My post partum assignment was good to me giving me time to ice my back periodically while charting.  I did have one triage patient that requested me so I got to do that as well making the work load a little more even as the triage nurse was much busier than I was.  There was time to visit with the volunteer who was wise, joyful and interesting to talk to.  It was one of those days that we are all so thankful to have every once in a while meaning my back didn’t even notice that I was off work.  I am on the mend, but being on the cautious side.  Grandpa hasn’t been letting me lift or help move anything I’m sure that is helping too.  Gotta feel the love for sure. 

By contract we generally can’t be put on call for a regularly scheduled shift.  It just so happened that I was scheduled with another traveler, in an effort to not have both RN’s on the floor be travelers the hospital called and asked if I would be willing to be on call.  Really? No way! I have not been asked this assignment so far and would never have asked for or expected the call.  Now I do know that it means a drop in pay for this week, but my back needed a longer rest.  It would allow me to have going away breakfast with Chad and the Kids who were heading north from the restaurant back to Oregon where they will prepare for the next assignment as I finish this one.  We were joined by Suzanne, Jeremy, Hadassah, and Elijah who would head to the airport to fly home, Uncle Richard, and Grandpa.  The alarm went off at five. We dashed around getting kids up and in the car, folding blankets, stuffing sleeping bags, unloading the freezer, deflating the air mattress, emptying a last drawer, putting grandpa’s bed in storage in the garage, checking the back yard for toys, taking the garbage to the curb and locking up the house for the last time.  We were a little late to our breakfast date pulling in at 0611.  No one was focused on their food we were all kind of dumb founded that this moment was appon us so soon. We visited and the kids colored, still waking up. 

Didn’t we have another month?  

As warm and cozy as the house still feels it won’t ever have the same feel again…. Hugs all around as we parted our ways. After breakfast Grandpa and I caravaned to Uncle Richards house to unload my clothes and backpack.  I made a call to the hospital to check up on the OB unit.  They promised to give me a warning call when things started to get busy assuring me to stay where I was at and not to worry about hanging out close by unless I have heard from them.  I had some errands to run and so did Grandpa so we decided to do them together.  We went to the lab for a second urine drug screen in 24 hours.  This one was for the position in Alaska (I have never been so drug screened in my life, but hey bring it on).  After that we picked up Grandpa’s dry cleaning.  As we were visiting with the associate a lady next to us said something to the effect of hey you’re the guy who is renting your house to us.  We turned to see the cheerful face of Grandpa’s new tenant.  She followed us to the house to make a final pre cleaning lady inspection.  It was weird to walk through the house that was filled with family only hours before now with someone who’s wheels were visibly turning about how many things she planned to do and change just as soon as she had a chance.  I would be just like her eager to make my new home uniquely mine, but this time it was just a blunt reminder that our job/time here was done…ready or not.  Grandpa gave her a key and we headed back out to pick up his dress shoes from the repair shop, and change his address at the post office, then we visited over a cup of coffee at Starbucks.  Grandpa flirted with the barista he is so funny.  I loved to hear the stories that kept coming to him.  A little pause in between and then another jewel of a memory.  He had a free lunch at the Garden Center so we ate there for lunch getting maybe a little too full on fish tacos.  The next stop was the bank, Kohl’s so I could get some jeans as both of my pairs had holes in them and then the gas station, and last of all the pharmacy.  We made eggs and sweet potatoe fries for dinner.  I had continued to ice my back in the morning and several more times in the evening.  Instead of being able to lift my leg only 1/2 inch of the ground I could now lift it 5-6 inches and at times even more than that.  The pain was much less and I was feeling like my back was 95% better.  Thank you God you knew exactly what I needed…a second day to rest my back, a chance to spend that much more time with Suzanne and her family, say goodbye to my husband and kids in person, and get so much accomplished that needed to get done.  Chad and the kids made good time to Redding.  I was jelous of the time they were able to spend with Al, Liz, and Tobias but I know I was where I needed to be doing what I needed to be doing.  I’m so thankful for that!!

I haven’t worked a long run of shifts this assignment until now. 6 shifts in seven days should not be too bad.  I don’t mind work at all, but I would be working all but one day that my sister would be visiting with her family.  It would be ok I told myself…we will make the most of our one day together.  It sounded good in theory.  Some how it hasn’t worked that way.  I managed to pinch my sciatic nerve making lifting my right leg more than a half inch off of the ground nearly impossible without extreme pain.  I knew that I would have to work the next day so even though I had never been to a chiropractor before it was my best chance at relief now.  We ended up spending most of the morning there.  A friend and I had to work on details of our hike today was the only day we both have off between now and when we leave.  She was willing to come to the house so that we didn’t have to go all the way to San Diego to lay out our hiking stuff and make sure we have everything we need. The kids were energetic so when we were almost done with examining our equipment the crew left to have lunch at In-N-Out.  They got home, Suzanne put the kids down for a nap and I iced my back.  I emptied out the kid’s room and just then FedX brought my urine drug screen for my new perdiem job.  You have to take the test within 24 hours of receiving it. Since I work tomorrow it had to be done today before the lab closed.  It was 3pm already so I asked if Suzanne would come with me but she could not so I drove myself to the lab where I sat in the waiting room for well over an hour missing what time we had left.  I got home after 6:00pm.  We worked a little more on detail things, sweeping and packing.  Around 7:00pm dinner supplies were gathered to go to Uncle Richard’s house for dinner.  The heavy traffic, the meal preparation time and time spent visiting (much need as Suzanne and Jeremy don’t get to visit Southern California very often) I couldn’t afford to get to bed late, not with an 0400 wake up call for work having not caught up from the last four early mornings.  I stayed home ate some icecream and iced my back, took a hot shower, then went to bed.  The crew came home between 10-11pm.  Still working on some things…so much to do and we had to be out of the house by 0600 the next morning. 

In the last two days we have recieved some exciting news.  I was offered a per diem position that I accepted so we are feeling a little more ready for our return to “normal” life.  My dream job at this time would be per diem at both of my favorite hospitals.  With one I can hold out and wait for the other.  I love my coworkers, and Labor & Delivery and want to be a pinch hitter for the busy days while taking a brake from the crazy schedule we have been keeping for the last two years.  Chad, Grandpa and Uncle Richard have been preparing our retiring age car for the long haul up to Kodiak.  We have been good about regular maintenance, but at 275,000 miles a thorough check up was needed and a whole list of things replaced.  And last but not least.  It is late but knowing my little sister is in the area headed this way is going to make it hard to sleep.  We are so excited to enjoy the company of Suzanne, Jeremy, Hadassah, and Elijah this week.  I have to work every day except one that they are here making me a little bummed.  The kids are anxious for them to come and I am hoping they are anxious to get here and hang with us and Grandpa too.  

Costa Mesa was farther away but ran right by the Starbucks in Fallbrook which makes everything better.  I left the alarm set at 0415 but took my time getting ready  not getting out of the house until nearly 0500.  Yes I was still really early.  It gave me time to work on our blog posts and talk to my mom on the phone as she went to work, it was a good conversation too.  Our days here are numbered.  Chad and the kids leave in one week.  A lot needs to get done and coordinated between now and then and I only have two days off. Tomorrow and next Monday or Tuesday.  Then It will just be me here for my last two weeks.  I will get to bunk with Uncle Richard, Grandpa Lawhead, and Marisa as the Fallbrook house will have new tenants moving in on the 1st.  It is going to go by fast.  I look at the plan and it makes me a little dizzy. We will be in Salem all of a day and a half before leaving for Alaska all of our things will need to be unpacked and repacked as we will need different things thank goodness Chad and the kids will have an extra week to help with the pod, a chance for pre-packing, and it will give the kids more play time with Cyrus, Aunt Stephanie, and Uncle Jayson a few of their favorite people on the planet.  As my mom and I talked plan I feel at peace that it will all get done.  That doesn’t make it easier to get it all done, but it really has gone well for the nature of this kind of family experience.  Who ever looks forward to sorting, dividing, organizing and clearing out their grandparents home meanwhile considering everyone’s feelings, desires, and doing whatever possible to respect and make it easier on your loved ones? Continued prayer will be needed in this area but God has been gracious.  We are all still friends as well as relatives.  

Class was ok, disappointing compared to my two previous STABLE classes.  The panda transport team from OHSU teaches an awesome STABLE class.  You have to have years of critical care NICU to have the experiences and stories as well as the confidence to teach this class well.  Instead of leaving confident in my refreshed skills ready to conquer the world.  I can barely remember what stable stands for because we didn’t even really talk about that.  Each test answer was given before we had a chance to read it for ourselves.  I’m not sure what the point of having certificates and extra credentials if having them is not proof of you knowing he information or being trained to do well what it says that you can do on the paper.  Now sick babies don’t terrify me, but I definitely have a healthy fear as it can be scary. But I feel like I need to take the class over again tomorrow from a better teacher.  It will have to wait until next year though.  I got home shortly after 1pm (that is after the 70 mile drive…it was the shortest 8hr class ever 😕 maybe because it was less than 4 hours).  We visited Grandpa and talked about what this next weeks plans are and pod times and specifics of schedule.  Then we came home to let in the chimney sweep.  Grandpa met us at the house and we all went out for dinner. We have to make tomorrow count so I had better get some rest, goodnight. 

It was overkill, but my alarm was already set for 0415 AM.  The 0800 class that was only 31 miles away took me approximately 31 minutes to get there which meant that I was there only three hours early… You just never know.  It had a San Diego address and I didn’t want to have to deal with terrible traffic that happens between 0600 and 0800, but fighting a cold I probably should have tried to get maybe another hour of sleep.  The class was uneventful and now that it is over I can return to work… Yay! I was home early and thought maybe a nap might be in order (still trying to keep this cold in hand and keep it from kicking my backside) I slept for two hours it was fabulous.  We had dinner and I hung with the kids a bit attempting to FaceTime Steph to return her call that I recieved in class in the morning.  I got everything layed out for STABLE in the morning that would be quite a bit farther away in Costa Mesa.  The kids got all tucked into bed and together we thanked God for family time, Balboa park, Grandma and Grandpa, and for getting to travel as a family to see the United States.  I shot my friend a text just to check in. We talked a little back and forth.  It has been on my mind all week, but I have been so amazed at God’s hand in all the details of life the last few weeks. 

I needed to get these classes done, I didn’t really appreciate having to miss a day of work to take fetal monitoring, but God knew I needed that break to get every thing that needed to get done with the house done.  The classes I needed to have just happened to be available on my scheduled days off and in my area.  I was able to get registered for all three of them.  Then discovered that the information on my first class was wrong and I would not be able to take it…it wasn’t my error so I would be completely refunded the money for it. That was the only two day class, the most expensive class, the one scheduled while my beloved in-laws would be here, and the only one I did not have to have as I was told the Advanced class (only one day and about half the cost) would fill the requirement.  This allowed me to spend the entire in-law visit with my family feeling much more refreshed to go back to work. I got to the Advanced class to find out that it was rescheduled for that day from the previous week for what reason I don’t know but imagine how far out of luck I would have been if they had not rescheduled it!  You and I know it wasn’t really luck.  The list goes on and on.  Thank you God for telling me in so many ways this week that you are with me and you love me.  I would never be able to be good enough to deserve a relationship with you, that doesn’t seem to matter to you.  You call me your inheritance and say that you are mine.